The Show

Have you ever looked closely at a dancers feet? They are absolutely disgusting. Skin is torn up, callouses have developed, and more often than not toes are pointing strange ways.

I am a dancer. My feet are pretty gross and I’m totally aware of it. After class, I like to soak in a hot bath cuz it feels real nice on my sore muscles.

Ya know what I love about it though? When you see a dancer dancing beautifully on stage, you don’t see their feet. You see beautiful lines, exquisite turns and jumps, and gravity defying allusions. It’s beautiful. All the hard work in classes of turning over and over, stretching, and dancing your guys out pays off.

In the end, there’s a beautiful show.

And that’s all the audience sees: the show, the art, the beauty.

Imperfection

Today was one of those days. You know the ones…where you feel like you can’t do anything right. I fought back tears in my favorite class, dance. Dance is my class. My release. My imperfection started to get to me.
“Everyone else is getting it. The teacher is making you stand out cuz she knows you can’t do it.” LIES.
I had to fight back the lies and the tears as I walked home from class.

When I got home, I heard a new song. This song touched my heart. I haven’t had a song do that for quite some time.

“God of my hope, God of my need
God of my pain that no one else will ever see
God of my healing, God of my strength
God who has always and will forever reign
God of my everything”

I praise God these words are truth. God is God of my everything. Despite how I feel, he is faithful. I am still His child, His Beloved. I still feel insecure and inadequate, but I can trust the fact that God won’t leave me there. I know I have a purpose beyond myself and my feelings.

Read more: Bebo Norman – God Of My Everything Lyrics | MetroLyrics

Guest Posting

Today I’m guest posting on my friend Allison’s blog about fashion, style, and who I am in Christ. Feel free to take a peak!
In line with clothing and style, I decided to show you guys what I’m wearing today! I’m wearing riding boots (my favorite!), a chambray shirt, black jeans, and a scarf as a pop of color.:)
Have a lovely Tuesday readers!

Don’t do that!

Growing up, I have always heard sin was bad stuff. Like lying, stealing, etc. Sin was always something to avoid, but something that everyone did, despite not trying to. I struggled on and off with the battle of trying not to sin, but knowing ultimately I would anyway. Finally it got to the point where I “tried” to do the best I could to avoid sin. I realized after years of doing this that I had it all wrong. It wasn’t about “trying” to be better, but aiming to honor God. The battle isn’t about avoiding sin, but trying to follow God and his plan for my life. As you seek closer to follow God, you naturally find yourself desiring sin less and less.

So what is sin?
I’ve been taking a class at my church called Transformations. It’s an amazing class about God’s character and what it really means to follow Him. In this class, I learned about sin in a way I have never heard it before. All sin is trying to meet legitimate needs illegitimately.
From my own life, this is something I do constantly. One example is when I’m hungry and I fill up on junk food instead of cooking myself a good meal that I know will satisfy.

On a personal level, I struggle with finding my identity based on my circumstances with those around me. It is unfair to my friends and the people in my life to find my identity in them. It puts pressure on those people I love and my needs are still left unsatisfied. I used to go from person to person being a taker trying to fill my own needs. When I realized my needs can only be filled in God, I stopped searching for people to fill my needs AND my relationships grew in ways I never expected. When I found myself in God’s love, I was made complete by him and was able to love others with His love. The best part? God is completely capable and powerful enough to completely satisfy every longing of my heart.

“Sin is whatever breaks relationship, and love is whatever blesses relationship.”

I love the journey of learning to love others with God’s power and grace. God has a beautiful way of taking relationship and blessing it. Relationship is important to God. Healthy relationship with others brings God pleasure. Relationship is important to me. Following God is important to me. But I will fail on every level every day and my failure doesn’t matter. I’m accepted and loved by a God who is big and powerful. And there’s the beauty in this whole thing. I don’t have to do this by myself.